How to Take Charge in a Relationship

YouTube video
Video how to lead in a relationship

No one desires a partner who lacks direction and simply drifts through life. This holds particularly true for women. Research indicates that women who possess more options and attractiveness prefer a spouse who is on par with them or even better. Hence, a lack of purpose is a significant warning sign for women seeking committed relationships.

The power to lead, whether in the world or within a relationship, lies in your ability to influence others. You may wonder why men need to lead, but historically, women have married for security and social mobility. This desire for security encompasses both physical and psychological aspects, irrespective of whether the partner is considered “good” or “bad.”

However, it is crucial to understand that leading in a relationship does not entail forcing your partner to blindly follow you. Instead, it involves fostering an environment of mutual respect and support, where both you and your partner can thrive. It is about discerning when it is appropriate for you to take the lead and when it is necessary to step back.

Set Your Intentions from the Start

In every relationship, men and women assume various roles, ranging from traditional gender roles to becoming confidants, motivators, financial planners, seducers, and more. However, many people fail to contemplate how they want to be in a relationship beyond the initial desire to be with someone after growing tired of casual encounters.

Further reading:  Lesbian Speed Dating: Real Connections in Real-Time

To establish a strong foundation, it is essential to set your intentions for the relationship and carefully select a compatible partner. This involves considering aspects such as the frequency of trying new experiences, communication methods, conflict resolution, and emotional and physical desires. Having clarity about your ideal relationship paves the way for actively incorporating those elements into your partnership.

Listen, Don’t Just Fix

Creating a secure environment entails being a compassionate listener and avoiding the urge to immediately solve every issue your partner raises. As a skilled leader, it is crucial to take a step back and truly understand the situation without allowing your ego to cloud your judgment. Active listening strengthens trust in relationships and demonstrates your genuine care and concern.

Women often need to vocalize their thoughts and feelings to arrive at their own resolutions. When you constantly attempt to fix everything, you hinder this process and potentially trigger recurring arguments or create an impression of indifference. Being able to discern when it is appropriate to offer advice is a valuable skill. If in doubt, simply clarify the intention of the conversation at the outset.

Be Emotionally Stable

Men who lack mental resilience tend to be heavily influenced by the emotional fluctuations of their wives or girlfriends. Similarly, women can also fall victim to manipulative behavior from emotionally unstable partners. As a masculine energy in the relationship, your role is to provide emotional stability by being purpose-driven and not allowing momentary emotions to overpower you.

While it is crucial to empathize with your partner, it is equally important not to become engulfed by their emotional state. Even high-value women can test the strength of their partners’ emotional baseline. They seek assurance that you can maintain a secure emotional space, even during challenging times. Attempting to be a continuous “nice guy” often backfires and hinders the growth of a healthy relationship.

Further reading:  Terry Real Relationship Grid

Lead by Example

Trying to force someone to follow you never nurtures lasting loyalty. Instead, genuine leadership comes from demonstrating your capability to make sound decisions, react thoughtfully, and act as a reliable guide. Coercion is never the path towards a fulfilling romantic partnership.

To take the lead, focus on being decisive, continuously developing your mindset and skills, and embodying the traits and intentions you desire in an ideal relationship. By displaying consistent leadership qualities, you will inspire trust and respect.

Maintain Integrity

The hallmark of a strong individual, regardless of gender, is integrity. It builds predictability, reliability, and forms a strong foundation for taking charge in a relationship. Without integrity, it becomes challenging to establish lasting bonds, whether in friendships or romantic connections.

Beware of statements like “I’m not the type of person who…,” as they often indicate a lack of integrity. Upholding your word and being true to yourself are vital components of successful leadership in relationships.

Embrace Independence

Always be willing to walk away. Many men fall into the trap of becoming emotionally dependent on their partners, fearing they will never find another suitable companion. This mindset strips them of their self-esteem and allows for unhealthy behaviors to persist. Setting boundaries is essential, as it demonstrates self-respect and a clear understanding of what you want from the relationship.

Maintain your individual interests, pursue personal growth, and avoid making your partner the sole source of your happiness. Independence and self-assurance contribute to a healthier and more balanced relationship.

Continually Evolve

Over time, relationships tend to fall into routines and lose the excitement they once had. You may start to resemble best friends rather than romantic partners. This usually occurs when personal growth ceases, and you stop learning from your decisions and experiences.

Further reading:  Does Sam Heughan Have A Girlfriend?

To prevent this stagnation, always strive for personal development. Be proactive in working on yourself, continuously evolving, and keeping your relationship dynamic and vibrant.


Taking charge in a relationship requires being intentional about the type of person you want to be. Women seek safety and security within the context of a romantic partnership. To lead effectively, you must know your desires from the start, actively listen to your partner, maintain emotional stability, lead by example, uphold integrity, embrace independence, and consistently improve yourself. By following these guidelines, you can create a fulfilling and successful partnership.


  1. Six Minute Dates –